the day after tomorrow

so not today... and not tomorrow... but the next day... i'll be on a plane to london. SWEET! but unfortunately for me, right this second i'm laying on a bed barely able to move so much as my fingers because i've been packing and moving boxes and furniture (or at least telling other people to move furniture, which can be just as exhausting! haha) for almost two whole days. plus sporadic days prior to that. my apartment is much like my purse... a never-ending pit. literally every single time i decide "ok... i can't zip this purse up anymore there's too much crap in it... it's time to clean it out" and i dump its contents on the table... i am ASTOUNDED. seriously, how is it possible that all of that was in that tiny cute little purse. and so it is with my apartment. where in the world did we put this stuff for three years!? considering the fact that our apartment is the size of some people's walk-in closets, i just don't get it. never-ending, i tell you. there was always one more thing to pack or load on the trucks. and then the cleaning... it is absolutely DISGUSTING that i was literally vacuuming up three year old dust. but seriously, how am i supposed to get to that when we have completely overstuffed our house with furniture and my bed is shoved against a wall? (we'll leave the fact that i have to climb over the lump that his my husband or hurdle the foot-board to get in bed for another post). anyway, hours of packing, moving, packing the random crap we forgot to pack when doing the "official" packing, more moving, shuffling, and then unloading. AND... when we get back from europe in two and a half weeks, we get to go through the mound of boxes now sitting in my in-laws storage unit to pack for DC. :) i love today... and the fact that my feet are throbbing and i haven't put so much as a spec of make-up on today or showered... and for some strange reason my lips are burning like they're sun-burned or something. haha. and i love that this will be my last post before i leave for europe and it's just going to sit here on my blog for two and a half weeks reminding everyone who reads it what a whiner and complainer i am. :)

oh... and THANK YOU to everyone who helped today. AMAZING! the part where we thought we had everything packed and everyone moved the furniture and boxes went SO fast. (and then the realization of all the random crap came... oh well). love you all! au revoir! ciao! i'll send postcards! :)

favs from the mouth of my husband

direct quote from burton, sitting on the other side of the room from me:

"if i spit my gum at you, can you throw it away for me?"

haha. sometimes i think he's the funniest person i know.

three three three three...

so... if kate can copy me, i can copy her.

three things that scare me
1. the potential of long car rides with really annoying people who either can't shut up OR can't sustain a conversation.
2. the dark. yes... i am 28 years old and afraid of the dark.
3. the freeway right before 106th south in salt lake city -- BARELY avoided two really bad accidents right there and i tense up every time.

three people who make me laugh
1. burton -- pretty much everything he says is hilarious.
2. dave & bart -- which i know is two people, but if you knew them you'd know it was a package deal.
3. kam -- which i miss. because we don't share an office anymore and so i don't get to crack up all day long while i'm at work anymore.

three things i love
1. laughing so hard you think you're going to cry.
2. road trips -- long ones.
3. childhood friends.

three things i hate
1. ending a phone conversation. "ok.. good to talk to you... you too... i'll let you know how it goes... ok great... great... alright well, have a good day... you too... k, bye... bye" (lame!!)
2. red lights. stop signs. yield signs. cross walks. basically stopping my car.
3. and... drum-roll please... thawing chicken.

three things i don't understand
1. child pornography.
2. statistics.
3. burton's belly button lint -- seriously!! where the crap is it coming from!?

three things on my desk
1. bed sheets.
2. two pillows.
3. a down comforter. (recognizing a pattern here?)

three things i'm doing right now
1. getting paid.
2. ummmm...
3. and that's about it... haha.

three things i want to do before i die
1. go to egypt.
2. learn a really cool language, like chinese.
3. finish reading all the books i've started.

three things i can do
1. drive a stick-shift like i'm a race car driver.
2. negotiate.
3. keep little kids entertained -- i usually can't walk the next day, but in the moment it's fun.

three things i can't do
1. eat mayo without initiating my gag reflexes.
2. tolerate rude customer service people.
3. hide my feelings.

three things i think you should listen to
1. your parents.
2. music that makes you smile.
3. criticism.

three things you should never listen to
1. ignorance.
2. hatred.
3. women when they're pms-ing.

three things i'd like to learn
1. the alto parts for all the songs in the hymn book.
2. patience.
3. speed reading... so i can finish all those books i've started.

three favorite foods
1. really good ceasar salad.
2. katrina filet at macaroni grill (which you can't get anymore!! grrr!).
3. rice crispie treats.

three shows i watched as a kid
1. saved by the bell.
2. full house.
3. the price is right, when i was sick and got to stay home from school.

three things i regret
1. worrying so much about what people thought of me in school.
2. not booking our hotels in europe earlier.
3. not getting a professional photographer for our wedding.

three people i'm tagging
1. if you're reading this... you're it!

if my life was a movie...

if my life was a movie, what would my soundtrack be?

so, here's how it works:
1. open your music library
2. put it on shuffle
3. press play
4. for every question, type the song that's playing
5. when you go to a new question, press the next button
6. don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.

(side note: i swear i did exactly what it says above, and they came out just like they are below... but some of them are bizarrely perfect... i guess i'm just naturally cool, no pretending here)

opening credits: "alameda" by elliot smith (uh... ok?)

waking up: "i can’t" by radiohead (so true... so so true)

first day at school: "american idiot" by green day (hahaha... wow)

in love: "talk" by coldplay (for all those poor young men i've dated and had oh-so-many "talks" with... i truly am sorry for putting you through that)

fight song: "just another" by pete yorn (you know me... all i do is throw punches)

breaking up: "delicate" by damien rice (cause i'm such a princess)

prom: "the word" by the beatles (we're not going to talk about prom)

life's ok: "black" by sarah mclachlan (so, i guess it's NOT ok)

mental breakdown: "(night time is) the right time" by ray charles (i always say that... the only time to have a breakdown is late at night... definitely)

driving: "a foggy day" by frank sinatra (i hate driving in fog)

flashback: "china roses" by enya (remembering them is my favorite part)

getting back together: "nothing left to lose" by mat kearney (so we might as well)

birth of child: "silver bells" by bing crosby (so maybe it's christmas... )

wedding: "it’s good to be in love" by frou frou (i SWEAR i didn't cheat)

final battle: "i’ll be seeing you" by billie holiday (seeing you getting your face kicked in by my round-house kick to your head!! grrrrrrrr!)

death scene: "witchcraft" by wolfmother (i always knew that's how i was going to go)

funeral song: "sadness" by enigma (i SWEAR! ... and i expect everyone to cry!)

end credits: "running to stand still" by u2 (might as well)


ok... now it's your turn!

geez woman... come on... get a blog!

i have decided that there are two possible reactions to the world once you start "blogging"... you either: (a) talk to fewer strangers because you're getting all the random crap out of your head online, or (b) talk to more strangers because you suddenly feel like you have free reign to say whatever you want, whenever you want, to whomever you want. and then there's me... not only do i fall into category "a" but i have gone one step further, and i no longer want strangers to talk to ME about the random crap in their heads. i used to be so patient... but now...

(random side-note to illustrate the point i am about to make:) you know how when you're somewhere in public and people are getting a little too friendly for you to feel comfortable? let's take me, sitting in church up in island park, idaho this past easter sunday... sitting two rows behind a couple who could not stop staring longingly into each others eyes, or caressing each others cheeks, or kissing periodically. first of all, if i ever dated someone who caressed my cheek, i think i would have puked right then and there and said "i'm sorry... this just isn't going to work". but my point here is, that there is a natural human instinct to say "people... come on... get a room!" so... this brings me to my point about random strangers talking about random crap...

so, yesterday i'm standing in line at the grocery store behind a VERY pregnant woman and her older mother. this was no eavesdropping scenario like previously mentioned, this was one of those situations where you want a mute button, but unfortunately for you, there just isn't one for this game called "life". i'm sure all the innocent little cashier asked was something like "so when are you due?", and then proceeded to be land-blasted with way more detail about this woman's life than ever necessary. i came into the conversation right about "well... my husband and i want to name her courtney, but our 3 year old little boy is dead set on samantha, and he wants to call her sammy for short, but we just don't know about that. we had a little foster girl named samantha and our little boy was just so attached to her, and she will just always be the samantha in my life to me, but our little boy just won't have it, so we bought him a cat and called it sammy in hopes of changing his mind about the name and that worked for about two days and then he wanted nothing to do with it..." HOLY CRAP!... and these were the exact words that went through my mind "geez woman!... come on... get a blog!"

so this is what i've come to... i am now wanting the world to allow me the choice about whether to know what craziness is going on their heads. and i would like that choice to be controlled by blogspot please. thank you.

LOL -- that means laugh out loud

when i was up in canada last week, i found a box of old letters and emails (yes... i used to print my emails... you can laugh, but it's cool to have them now!)... and it was seriously hilarious. i found myself laughing out loud all alone in my parents spare room (note: haven't had a designated room at the parentals place in something like 11 years... sad days). so, reading old letters and emails was awesome. almost therapeutic, if you will. the emails were hilarious, because not only did my friends and i email each other about 50 times a day (like prehistoric long form chatting), but we used our parents email addresses because it was before the days of free hotmail accounts (among others). so we would write in code so our parents couldn't see what we were saying (not that what we were saying was of any consequence... it was just fun to do). and the best part was the discovery of, what would be considered today, commonly used internet chatter... for example, here are some direct quotes:

" :) -- that's a sideways smiley face"

"LOL -- that means laugh out loud"

because i didn't already feel old! anyway, i have boxes and boxes of letters and notes and emails from back in the day. i literally have notes all folded up like ninja stars from 6th grade. why, you ask? because i have a problem. :) but seriously, there's something so great about sitting down for a couple of hours and reading the kind of random crap you used to say in 6th grade. "later dude... that is so radical... NOT... oh he is soooo cute" HAHA. i have notes and letters that were basically well-documented brawls between girlfriends. i have a handful of emails that were essentially virtual break-ups. i even have a box of letters I WROTE that i either never sent or made copies of for some strange psychotic reason. so... it was fun. entertaining to say the least. makes me miss my friends who are far away and appreciate more the friends who are close by. i truly have been blessed with great friends. GREAT friends. people who drop anything for their friends. people who can make you laugh until you cry. people who tell it like it is and make you a better person. people who walk into a room and make you want to burst with excitement because you just love them so much! both old friends and new friends and old friends who reappear... the Lord continually brings the most amazing people into my life. anyway, reading old letters, emails, notes... even my crazy embarrasing journals (wow)... one of my favorite things to do. hilarious stories, funny memories, sad moments, totally embarrasing boy-crazy moments... it's just fun to realize all the work that has gone in to making us all who we are. glad you're all a part of my insanity! :)

short and stupid

"I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone wants to get a hold of me, they just say 'Mitch,' and I say 'what?' and turn my head slightly." - Mitch Hedberg

ok... so i do own a cell phone (definitely not a pager... seriously... who owns a pager?), but i do love how this quote rings true of instant messaging. if i could, i would completely eliminate verbal communication from my life (haha... who am i kidding... have you ever tried to get me to stop talking... ), but when it comes to business... i think we should leave the verbal communication out of the equation. if this were my quote... here's what it would say:

"I don't like using my phone at work. I just keep a really long IM contact list of everyone I know. If someone wants to get a hold of me, they just type 'Janaya,' and I type 'what?' and move my fingers slightly." - Janaya

plus... then i avoid the inevitable of saying something really stupid before thinking it through, reading it over, fixing the grammar (haha... have you seen my IMs), rewriting it so it says it in a more diplomatic way, and then sending on my perfectly crafted virtual communication. plus, i type like the woman behind the counter booking gaylord's flight on "meet the parents", so it's almost faster than talking. sometimes if i stop and listen to my typing it makes me laugh 'cause it sounds like i'm fake-typing.

anyway... stupid post. but i'm in another one of those lulls where i feel pressure to make them long and good. so this one is short and stupid. :)

hannah-banana

so... i'm in canada. i came home for a week to renew my passport so burton and i can go on our trip to europe -- thank you passport canada for only expediting applications submitted in person, it was just so convenient and inexpensive. ;) the fun part is i got to come home to canada and i haven't been home in a year and a half. truth is, i was getting pretty homesick. it's not like the kind of homesick where i miss my actual home necessarily, but i just LOVE the grey and pink sky and pebble beaches and black ocean and green green really green grass and evergreens everywhere and deer in every other front yard and the accents and the people... and the rain. there's just something about the rain in the pacific northwest... it's just different. i love it. and then there's my dog. normally i try to shoot for funny and uplifting on my blog (or at least funny... and maybe that's at the expensive of others or myself, but sometimes that can be uplifting)... but i'm going to talk about my dog for a sec. remember #44 on the list of 100 things about moi? ("i could make myself cry right this very minute if i start to think about the possibility of my dog dying. and i'm going to leave it at that so i don't.")... well, i've had my moment's this weekend. i came home and instantly noticed that my cute (albeit, fat) dog looked something similar to a bison. she had a big hump on her back... something like a fatty tumor, possibly cancer (apparently a big problem in the golden retreiver breed). hannah (that's her name) is about 12 years old... something like 84 in dog years... so she's pretty much like having an old lady in the house. she aches and deals with arthritis and lays around a lot (although, that's not new... see pictures)... she needs help getting up, needs to lay down after too much exercise. and now she's got a tumor. so it looks like this is it for my furry friend. if she was young and vigorous, it might be worth attempting to remove the tumor, but we're all coming to grips with the fact that it's just that time. she's a really funny dog... she's lazy (hence the fat) and she loves lettuce over dog treats (which you'd think would help the fat... but it doesn't seem to) and she plays dead when you say "bang" and she doesn't like to catch balls and she sits and watches frizbees wiz passed her head. she likes our jacuzzi tub and she knows that when i come home, she gets to sleep on the bed with me (which has gotten more and more difficult the fatter and older she's gotten... she slept on the floor this time, cause she can't climb on the bed). she used to roll her eyes at me when i would try and get her to come running with me (sometimes she'd even hide) and she LITERALLY pouts when i leave to go back home. sits next to a wall and leans... won't look at me... it breaks your heart (burton's seen it, he'll attest to this). she's just a really funny dog and i have to say that putting your dog down is right up there with leaving home for the first time and losing your first love and all those things that you know you'll get over but in the moment you feel like your heart is broken into a million pieces. i'm a sentimental person, so of course saying good bye to my dog is an emotional thing--and unless you've had a dog that thinks you're the greatest thing in the whole world and can hardly contain themselves when they see you no matter how much time has passed between visits, you'd probably never really get it. and so, i'll say good bye... shed some tears... go home and watch "all dogs go to heaven" and cry some more and then carry on until the next puppy comes along and breaks my heart with those big brown eyes and i'll do it all over again.

but in the meantime, i'm just going to miss my hannah-banana.